endless affairs

-panah arjuna-

2011-07-20T10:26:00.017+08:00

(percubaan pertama sepenuhnya menulis dalam bahasa melayu)
ok, i blank fer about half an hour.

first thing first, google maksud panah arjuna (ok xfaham, nvm...) so anggap jerlah its a cupid arrow. and why did i posted such an angry picture? because i am ANGRY! cupid nie tolonglah panah kat orang lain, kenapalah panah kat i? i tak suka u tau tak?????? eiiiiiii marah betul!

since anak panah tu dah hit betul2 kat hati (lain kali mintak tolong panah jerlah kat kaki ok, thank you in advance!!! eiiiiiiiiiiiiiii "stupid cupid you're a real mean guy, i'd like to clip your wings so you cant fly, i'm in love and its a crying shame, and i know that you are the one to blame, hey hey.. set me free, stupid cupid stop picking on me! :p) bermulalah episod/drama/telenovela/reality show dan sebagainya, yang kadang-kadang membuatkan kita girang <<<--- pinjam favourite word ejoy, which includes : senyum sorang2 (bukan gila, but happy) -this is when yer closest frens kutuk you bagai nak gila- masa tu mmg kena banyakkan bersabar ok.. dan adakalanya membuatkan kita jadi seperti gambar diatas (at the end of the day boleh jadi gila jugak lah, contoh : GERAM GILA!!!!) -jika ada yang perasan, perkataan gila memang banyak digunakan di 2nd paragraph. maksudnya, terkena panahan arjuna boleh menjadi gila, salah satu sebab kenapa saya tak suka dipanah-

another blank moment

(i shall continue when i feel like it)

-you make me weak-

2011-05-12T13:48:00.000+08:00

each and everyday i'm thinking to myself, i should let him go, i should let him fly, release him cos he neva really want to stay, he neva did.

-will you still love me tomorrow-

2011-03-19T19:51:00.006+08:00

peace. it does not mean to be in a place where there is no noise, trouble and hard work. it means to be in the middle of those those things and still be calm in your heart ~unknown~

-a book, a person, a song-

2011-02-23T13:18:00.005+08:00

sleeping all through the storm (fold hands under cheek and pretend to sleep) all i need is a good book, familiar faces and a song to sing.

“You live like this, sheltered, in a delicate world, and you believe you are living. Then you read a book(Lady Chatterley, for instance), or you take a trip, or you talk with Richard, and you discover that you are not living, that you are hibernating. The symptoms of hibernating are easily detectable: first, restlessness. The second symptom(when hibernating becomes dangerous and might degenerate into death): absence of pleasure. That is all. It appears like an innocuous illness. Monotony, boredom, death. Millions live like this(or die like this) without knowing it. They work in offices. They drive a car. They picnic with their families. They raise children. And then some shock treatment takes place, a person, a book, a song, and it awakens them and saves them from death." ~Anais Nin quotes (French born American Author of novels and short stories, 1903-1977)

Re-Union

2011-02-18T17:26:00.004+08:00

"A true friend is someone who thinks that you are a good egg even though he knows that you are slightly cracked." ~ Bernard Meltzer

~patience to stay & the strength to move on~

2010-12-20T14:22:00.013+08:00

She's the one you call when you're bored because she makes you laugh. She's the one you talk to when you're feeling down because she's willing to lend an ear & be a friend. She's NOT the one you call when you need a date to your company's Christmas party, or to go dancing with on a Saturday night. She's the one you spend time with between girlfriends, before you find "The One." You know, the one who you keep around in the meantime.

She's not one of the guys, not a tomboy, but you don't look at her as a 'real' woman, either. She's not b**chy enough, or moody enough to be seen in that light. She's too laid-back, too easily amused by the same things your male buddies are amused by. She's too understanding, too comfortable; she doesn't make you feel nervous or excited the way a 'real' woman does. But she's cool, and nice, and funny, & attractive enough that when you're lonely & need female companionship, she'll do just fine. You don't have to wine & dine her because she knows the real you already, & you don't have any facades to keep up, no pretenses to preserve. You're not trying to get anything of substance out of her, she's not easy, but you know that she cares about you & is attracted to you, & that she'll give you the friend you need. And you know you don't have to explain yourself or the situation, that she'll be able to cope with the fact that this isn't the beginning of a relationship or that there's any possibility that you have any real romantic feelings for her.

It won't bother her that you'll go on a date with the woman you've been mooning over for weeks who finally agreed to go out with you. She'll settle for a goodbye hug & a promise to call her & tell her how the date went. She's just so cool. But deep down, if you really think about it (which you probably don't because to you, the situation between the two of you isn't important enough to merit any real thought), you know that it's really not fair. You know that although she would never say it, it hurts her to know that despite all her good points & all the fun you two have, you don't think she's good enough to spend any real time with. Sure, it's mostly her fault, because she doesn't have to give in to your needs. She could play the hard-to-get person like the rest of them do, if she really wanted to. But you & she both know that she probably couldn't pull it off. Maybe she's too short, or a little overweight, or has a big birthmark on her forehead, or works at Taco Bell.

Whatever the reason, somehow life has given her a lot of really great qualities but has left out the ones that men want (or think they want) in a woman. So she remains forever the funny friend, the steadfast companion, & you go on searching for your goddess who will somehow be everything you ever wanted in a woman. You'll joke to her that she should be the best man at your wedding, & she'll laugh and make a joke about a smelly rental tux.

She doesn't captivate you with her beauty, or open doors with her smile. Mainly she blends in with the crowd. She's safe. She doesn't want to be the center of attention & turn the heads of everyone in the room, but she wants to turn someone's head. She wants to be special to someone, too. We all do. She is not perfect but She (like other women's too) has feelings; she has a heart. In fact, she probably has a bigger heart than any woman you've ever known because she's had a front-row seat to The Mess That Is Your Life, & she likes you anyway. She obviously sees something worthwhile & redeeming in you because although you've given her nothin.

- Unknown

(all who wander are not lost)

Why do men take second wives?

2010-08-19T17:48:00.006+08:00

HaVe FuN ReaDing!

Polygamy has nothing to do with culture or religion. Men, and women too, cheat because they can.

WHEN a male friend told me he planned on taking a second wife, all I could do was try not to choke on dinner. Are you serious, I asked. He said yes, he had fallen in love with a single mother, but it was not his fate to marry her.

Thinking it was perhaps due her compassion, her earnest desire to bring up her sprogs in a Godly way and that life was indeed a struggle, I choked on my dessert when my friend told me the first thing he noticed about her was that she owned a great set of jugs.

Now, my friend takes his religious obligations very seriously. His first wife wears the hijab. So to hear him admit that it was his paramour’s cleavage that caught his heart was quite shocking.

It was due to women like me, whose so-called Western, secular and feminist ideas of polygamy that pushed it underground. I then asked him, whether his equally-pious wife agreed to him taking on another wife, and he said no. She gave him an earful.

But our friend was on a roll. Now that his journey into polygamy was thwarted, it was all our fault. We modern Malay women, be they religious or not, were forcing men like him to marry in Thailand or Iran, where they practised nikah Muta’ah.

He was emulating the steps of our good Prophet Mohamed, he argued.

“You have got your Islamic history upside down! Nabi married war widows, and his first wife was older than he. Aishah was the youngest. And I don’t think our Prophet married any woman because she had great breasts!”
“You don’t understand.”

“Okay then. Why don’t you sell your car and take a camel to work then?”
I’m realistic. I know men who adore their wives and love them to bits, but they can still love their mistresses and other wives. Am I condoning affairs and polygamy? No. But this happens. It has nothing to do with Islam or being Malay, though polygamy is part of the culture.

We’re Asians. We have a long history of concubinage. There are good men who are faithful, and there are good men who have other wives. There are also bad men who are faithful and also bad men who are unfaithful.

Just like our politics, love in Malaysia is a circus. Weeee!
I’m not going to bore you with what polygamy in Islam is about, as it has been written before and talked about to death. Women’s rights activists have long fought for this “crime” to be illegal, but we face a tough fight. Sometimes it’s not the men who are itching for it, but yes, our gender, too.

In the 80s, when I was young and clueless, meeting mistresses and second or third wives would be sinful and against my principles.

These days? “Oh, you’re a mistress?” “Oh, you’re a hidden wife?” Yawn. Wear tudung or mini skirt, got. Educated or stupid, got. Some of our mothers are The Other Women, and are good mothers. So how?

Is this phenomenon particular to our culture? Oh no. Read the British newspapers. Mistressing is talked about to death in feminist columns.

But I thought after that dinner with my friend, I’d revisit the issue again. Some of the findings from my five-sen survey:
* Theoretically ... polygamy is OK. But must ikut hukum Allah lah. There are conditions.
* Ya, but… actually, kan, for career women like us, it does work. Nak jaga laki 24 jam … gue tak larat la. Biar bini nombor satu jaga. After all, in Islam, polygamous wives are taken care of legally. Better a Muslim second wife than a common law wife.
* But really. Think about it. Convenient, what. You see him once a week, makan once a week, have sex once a week...
* Sex once a week?! Baik tak yah jadi bini nombor dua macam tu! Chit. Once a week mana cukup?!

Why do men cheat? Again, just an observation dwelled upon by friends and myself. For a lot of polygamous men, they marry good women who fit their criteria of holiness, wifeliness and motherhood.

Intimacy between the men and their wives are perfunctory. It’s make-the-baby-cover-the-face sex. With their girlfriends and second wives, it’s Penthouse all the way, baby. It’s the soul thing.

At least this is what I got from talking to quite a number of married men. It’s not because of the first wives’ lack of trying; they want to have healthy intimate lives, but the bees in their husbands’s bonnets keep reminding the men of the Madonna-Whore syndrome.

Malaysia is not a place for single women desiring Hollywood-movie type of marriages and love. KL especially is a city for marriages and affairs. And it has nothing to do with money. There are rich men who cheat, and I know of a despatch boy who has two wives!

There are many single-again women like my friends and I, who still believe in marriage and love. But I can tell you, should we walk down that path again one day, we’re going down it with our eyes open and keep a part of our hearts to ourselves. Because you never know.

Perhaps my friend, an activist who makes a living entering and staying in war zones, is right.

“We have women like you, me, your mother, your aunt and friend who fight so hard for women and children and yet face a brick wall, simply because we ‘understand’ so much, and forgive all the time, which is why cheating, affairs and polygamy are rampant, to the detriment or contribution (depends how you look at it) of our well-being,” says my friend.

Another friend, Sharizal Sharaani, put it succinctly: “Men (and, yes, women too) cheat because they can. Full stop.”

The writer still believes in love and marriage and wants to move to Corfu.
A WRITER'S LIFE
By DINA ZAMAN

**depends how you look at it**

love the way you lie

2010-08-16T14:28:00.002+08:00

~tears in heaven~

2010-06-22T13:28:00.013+08:00

me whiskers angel.
~Bobby & Late Barbooshka~

one is loved because one is loved. no reason is needed fer lovin'

BARBOOSHKA
~in loving memory~

**Asistentes-del-Partido*

2009-10-19T16:46:00.008+08:00

~GARDEN BLUE~

~GO GREEN MONOPOLY CITY~

~DIVALI~

gucci & a box of chocolates

2009-08-26T14:01:00.020+08:00

~the simple things are also the most extraodinary things, and only the wise can see em'~

i lurve chocolates! gracias.. Really, it's not about the gifts actually, it's the thought that counts.

intense desire and attraction

2009-08-25T15:38:00.009+08:00

~my lil library~

make thy books thy companions. let thy cases and shelves be thy pleasure grounds and gardens.

Judah ibn-Tibbon (12th century)

~my lil kitchen~
where the lurve affair begins
His passion has aroused the best and the beast in man. And the beast waited for him in the kitchen ;) eheh.

to be continue...

2009-08-13T14:50:00.006+08:00

ONE MOMENT IN TIME
*********************
Each day I live
I want to be, a day to give the best of me
I'm only one, but not alone
My finest day is yet unknown
I broke my heart for every gain
To taste the sweet, I faced the pain
I rise and fall, Yet through it all this much remains

I want one moment in time
When I'm more than I thought I could be
When all of my dreams Are a heart beat away
And the answers are all up to me
Give me one moment in time
When I'm racing with destiny
Then in that one moment of time
I will feel, I will feel eternity

I've lived to be the very best
I want it all, no time for less
I've laid the plans
Now lay the chance here in my hands

Give me one moment in time
When I'm more than I thought I could be
When all of my dreams Are a heart beat away
And the answers are all up to me
Give me one moment in time
When I'm racing with destiny
Then in that one moment of time
I will feel, I will feel eternity

You're a winner for a lifetime
If you seize that one moment in time
Make it shine

Give me one moment in time
When I'm more than I thought I could be
When all of my dreams Are a heart beat away
And the answers are all up to me
Give me one moment in time
When I'm racing with destiny
Then in that one moment of time
I will be, I will be, I will be free I will be,
I will be free

momento
good restaurant, good company, good coffee, good food, good books
enjoy your every moment!

are u gonna finish strong?

2009-04-20T13:30:00.000+08:00

Along our life's journey, we have met a few very special people; who have inspired us to search for our own paths; push our own limits and discover the way we need to go and he's one of em'.

impromptu

2009-02-27T11:25:00.002+08:00

YOGA
i seriously hate yoga.

me laughing partner

in attendance

half bridge pose

one of the pose

freestyle

is this kung fu or yoga?

focusing

class of 2009